I’m going to start this week’s newsletter with an embarrassing childhood story. When I was about 10 years old my best friend and I both got strapped for misbehaviour at school. Our crime? During a class singalong of the unofficial Australian national anthem, Wayne and I decided the chorus would be made infinitely hilarious by the addition of a small syllable. So while everyone else belted out “Waaaaaltzing Matiiiiiilda, waaaaaltzing Matiiiiiilda”, we ad libbed our own version “Waaaaltzing Matildabubs, waaaaltzing Matildabubs”.
Unfortunately for us, our teacher didn’t share our comedic brilliance. I still remember him pointing to his chin and growling menacingly, “I’ve had it up to here with you two”.
At the time, getting whacked across the hand for a harmless stunt seemed beyond the pale to me, but from my current vantage point - that of a grumpy old fart who’s seen his own fair share of annoying kid behaviour - I do get it.
Anyhoo, that’s all by way of introducing this week’s word, mischievous. What makes it interesting isn’t the delightfully inventive tricks that Wayne and I got up to, but the fact that it so often gets mispronounced as mis-chee-veeus (not the correct mis-chuh-vus) and misspelled as mischievious.
Why is that? Do people not realise that there is no ‘i’ after the ‘v’? Have they never heard the word properly uttered before?
I suspect the answer to both questions is a kind of “yes”. Mischievous is hardly a common word, which means people will sometimes reach for what seems the most plausible spelling and pronunciation, rather than the correct ones.
What makes mischievious so alluring may be its similarity to words like devious, envious and previous. That, and the fact that commonly used words ending with the same “ivus” sound as mischievous may be non-existent. I certainly can’t think of any.
While mispronunciations (and misspellings) can provide great fuel for those who say language is going to the dogs, my view is that such mistakes aren’t random, but provide an interesting window into how our minds and the language work.
In the case of mischievous, you’ve got a group of letters - chiev - that you and I would generally interpret as a chee sound (think chief and thief). If we were seeing the word for the first time, there’d be an inevitable pull towards pronouncing it with the long ‘ee’ sound. That, in turn, calls for a second, short ‘e’, after the v, as in devious, envious, etc.
Rather than point the finger at the person who gets mischievous wrong, you could just as easily point it at English’s fickle phonetic rules, which, if they had been designed by a committee, would be cause for stringing those sadistic ne’er-do-wells up by their toes until they recanted. As they hung there, I would also give every person who’d ever had to learn English as a second language a free whack with a not-too-heavy dictionary.
Here’s another example. When I was a callow youth, irreparable was “correctly” pronounced only one way, with the stress on the second syllable and the ‘ai’ silent: ir-REP-rable. I don’t remember the last time I heard anyone use that pronunciation, and little wonder. ir-re-PAIR-able is more consistent with the pronunciation of repair, and there is no good reason I can think of to fight for the retention of what, in essence, is little more than a marker of class.
The thing about language is that while people will often make mistakes, there will usually be a valid reason for it. It’s way more interesting, in my view, to dig around for the reason than it is to complain about the error.
One other reason to withhold judgment is that a great deal of what you and I say and write today was once considered wrong. Up until the 17th century, our more fastidious ancestors pronounced the ‘k’ in words like knight, knock and knee. We’ve dropped the aspirated ‘h’ from words like hour and honest, and dispensed some time ago with the bothersome ‘b’ sound in debt.
English has been going to the dogs for centuries, and will probably continue going to the dogs for a long time yet. And nothing bad has happened yet or will happen in the future.
That doesn’t mean standards don’t matter. It means that with English, it’s useful to keep the two meanings of “standards” separate. English standards - as in “agreed measures” - have been moving around since the language emerged, with no impact on standards in the sense of “quality”. In fact, I’d say the availability of wonderful writing continues to expand and that you and I are spoiled for choice compared with our ancestors.
As for mischievous, if you’ve been pronouncing it mis-chee-veeus, you have a choice. If you decide to stay with what you’ve been doing, I’d be the last one to beat you around the head for it though. I have a funny feeling that in a few decades, your pronunciation will be considered standard and mine will be obsolete.
Note: In the original version of this article which went to all subscribers, I spelt irreparable irrepairable, falling victim to the very phenomenon the article is describing. That’s now been corrected.
Bits and specious
I mentioned Irish author John Boyne in a recent article on the word cis, asserting it would be wrong to accuse him of being transphobic. A little more research would have alerted me to the fact that many in the trans community strongly disagree with that statement. More here.
I’m an Adam Grant fan and am excited to know he’s got a new book in the works. Hidden Potential, written for anyone who’s interested how to improve at the art of improving, is scheduled to hit the shelves in October.
Another writer whose work I’m enjoying is evolutionary biologist Jerry Coyne. His blog, Why Evolution is True, featured in a recent Lingwistics newsletter when I took issue with his views on the misspelling “free reign”. In today’s tribal, monosyllabic culture, Coyne is not merely articulate, but a rare champion of free speech (including that of people he finds abhorrent), rational thought and vigorous debate free of ad hominem attacks. I don’t agree with all Coyne says, but as a model for how to conduct yourself in an exchange of views, he is exemplary.
Quote of the week
It is difficult to say who do you the most mischief; enemies with the worst intentions, or friends with the best.
Edward Bulwer-Lytton, 1st Baron Lytton
This is a great reminder! I'm one to pronounce this word mischievious and it does seem to fit when you say it that way. Thanks for this!
I’m curious. In the UK we have ‘irreparable’ but not ‘irrepairable’. (And, yes, I would stress the second syllable.)